Committed to finding ways out of the coercion/self-sacrifice mire of conventional parenting. We are variously critical rationalists, libertarians, home educators, attachment-parents, but we take our ideas where we find them.
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So many people say this. "It makes them feel safe". "It means they do not have to take responsibility for everything". "It means that they won't have a ghastly shock when they go to school and have to behave within certain conventions" (*cough* if they are going to go to school at all *cough*)
Children need guidance and advice, both about exploring the world without losing limbs, and about morality. But if someone sets an apparently arbitrary and inexplicable boundary, a child will see no reason to respect it once the parent's back is turned.
I haven't worked out a devastating, one-sentence, safe-for-use-with-strangers refutation of the "children need boundaries" claim. Have any of you?
"Ah... it's all over so quickly. In five years off they go to school..."
"Well, actually, we weren't necessarily planning to send our child to school. If it wants to go, of course it can, but we won't force it"
(*awkward silence*)
"But children need to go to school to make friends"
This seems to be the standard response to any suggestion of homeschooling.
Possible answers include:
"Why should my children's friends all be the same age as it? My friends aren't"
"My child is likely to make friends through the things it enjoys doing - ie through common interests. Being incarcerated in a school for 6 hours a day is a pretty sad common interest"
"The disadvantages of not coming into extensive contact with one or two potentially close friends are outweighed by the enormous advantage of not having to spend all day with 28 people who will never be more than casual acquaintances, at best"
"As adults do we usually meet our close friends through work? If not, how do we make friends? Are those paths closed to children?"
